Under the Tuscan Sun

Under the Tuscan Sun:  Mom and I melt like the wicked witch of the west from the Wizard of Oz. You thought LA was hot! Just wait till you get here.

Hi friends!

Today is our second and a half day in Florence and I guess I’ll start off by telling you that we live on the best street ever!!  It’s literally two blocks away from the Uffizi Gallery but that’s not what it makes it special. It literally is like the Rodeo Drive of Florence. There’s only high-end, brand name shops as you walk down and it’s in the height of the season. Now I’m not a big high fashion person, so most of these outfits are rather ridiculous to me, BUT it’s nice to pretend like I’m Beyoncé strutting down the streets of Rodeo Drive and these clothes just aren’t expensive enough for my tastes lol.

This display with the butterflies was so beautiful! I couldn’t help but pose and have Mom snap a bunch of pictures!!

We crossed the river in the morning as we eased our way to the Pitti Palace, home to whichever Duke of Florence that was reigning during the past couple hundred years and, oh my goodness, it was gorgeous!!! Honestly, it’s nothing much to look at from the front. But inside it’s as ornate as can be.

This is a view of the palace from the Boboli Gardens.

Here is a view of one of the many receiving rooms. If you ask me, they all look the same, but the nobles must not have known that or else they would have thrown a fit. There was a room for the Duke to receive ordinary nobles, a different room for high ranking nobles, a separate room for royals etc., you get the picture. Each one was decorated from floor to ceiling just like the Medici Offices.

They even had a room full of knickknacks from the Orient, aptly named the “Oriental Living Room.” It was raining pretty hard at this point so Mom and I killed some time inside with a mini photo shoot. Leave it to us to go to the gardens on a rainy day. As you can see, I had fun playing with the dressing room screen. I almost posed behind it but decided against it, since we still had the other half of the palace and I wasn’t ready to get kicked out just yet hehe.

Downstairs, the Steamy Alpaca met Hercules. He was very famous in this palace and made multiple appearances throughout the estate (Hercules, not the Alpaca).

Possibly my favorite part of the palace were the rooms dedicated to all the jewelry. I’m sure that was my crown in a past lifetime hehehe.

We transitioned outside to stroll the Boboli Gardens as by 11 the rains had stopped and had I not witnessed the downpour myself I would have never believed it ever happened with skies so blue and everything already dry.

Look at the great view of Florence they had! It must have been even better before all those buildings blocking the cathedral were built.

The gardens in and of themselves weren’t that impressive. And the sections that were, were totally blocked off so you couldn’t even enjoy them. It was 100 degrees out, so I hid in this alcove tree space. MAJOR REGRETS. Apparently when you go into nature with all the fallen leaves on the ground there are bugs and I am now sporting 20 red angry bites that have yet to go away. Should have never left the palace.

We escaped the lame gardens to visit the private rooms of the Pitti Palace and boy ,was it worth it. I’m talking silk Damask walls to match the Damask chairs, gold everywhere, and paintings lining the walls with barely any space between them.

Here’s a picture of my throne. Yes, I decided that now I own this palace.

No mirror is too old for a classic millennial selfie, even a 17th century one.

Ever wonder what Napoleon’s bathroom looked like? Apparently he took over this palace for a while and well, here you go. Now I understand why he wore heels! Look at how little the tub is!! Talk about an inferiority complex.

After a lunch where mommy and I ate a WHOLE PIZZA between the two of us (well, Florence pizza has a really think crust so you would think it was hard, but it wasn’t), we crossed back onto our side of the river and headed towards the Santa Maria Novella Cathedral. This time, the outside of the cathedral was just as good as the inside. It was such a pretty setup, I felt like Maria from the Sound of Music and was twirling around the gardens singing “How do you solve a problem like Maria?” Heheheh

Finally I got Mom to take a selfie with me!!! She’s very adamant about not asking strangers to take our picture cuz she thinks they’ll run away with my phone. 1. I’m pretty sure I can outrun them. And 2. Any phone is better than this malfunctioning iPhone 6 😂. It’s totally my fault though, I’m refusing to upgrade on principle.

I decided that maybe I’ll be buried after all, on the condition that I too get a marble statue, mine would be one of a male forever gazing longingly at my bones. And let’s take that swan away and replace it with something a little better, like an ALPACA!

See how beautiful the church is? This picture doesn’t do anything justice but you get the gist.

So much gold!

We ended the day with an AMAZING dinner of ravioli and chicken. I made a list of everything I wanted to eat in Italy and I’m happy to report that I’ve been quite successful thus far. The best thing I’ve eaten? This REAL tiramisu...ugh I can still taste it now. I will never be able to eat another one in the US again after this perfection.

Anyways, more adventures to come....tomorrow I’m going to see Michelangelo's David!!!

Love you lots!

Carolyn

Firenze

Dear Medicis,

Thanks for being the bomb and making art a thing.

Xx,

Carolyn


Hi Everyone!

I’m in Florence and I’m totally in love. It’s hard not to be when your hotel room looks like this!!!

Yup. That’s right. We have a fresco on our ceiling.

I’m going to recap the first and second day in Italy into one because the first day was kind of a half day so we did the outside of the Duomo and then inside the next morning.

Meet the Brunelleschi Dome, the largest brick dome in the world. Basically, the Italian king was pissy that the Turks in Istanbul had a bigger dome, so he wanted to build one to rival the Hagia Sophia. He held a competition amongst the architects stating that anyone who could make an egg stand upright on a table would be given the assignment. No one could do it until... good old Brunelleschi here walked up to the table, smashed the bottom of the egg, and, voila! It stood upright and he got the job. Talk about bold interview moves.

Mom and I being the art geeks we are got some gelato and walked around the entire Cathedral, calling out different designs and period styles of our favorite inlays.

Unfortunately, the outside is the most beautiful part of the building. Inside is rather simple with a few frescos. At least the inside of the dome itself is beautiful, but otherwise it was kind of a big tease we waited an hour plus in line for, hahaha.

However, I do have a funny story. Mom and I forgot that this was a Cathedral in Italy and there are RULES.  I know, don’t ask me how, and right near the front we saw a sign about dress code. Well cold shouldered dresses aren’t allowed and being the good half-brown daughter I am, I wasn’t about to give into the tourist trap of street vendors selling shawls for all the American dummies like me. So what do I do? I RUN to the hotel. Race up the stairs. The poor maid was cleaning our room and had the door open and was shocked when I came in like a madwoman. At this point I get a text from Mom telling me to hurry because the line we had been standing in for one and a half hours was suddenly moving at a rapid clip. So I rush into the room, calling “don’t worry, I’ll only be a minute, you’re good!” to the mail who probably only spoke Italian.  Grabbed leggings from my suitcase, threw them on with the door open and all (I was wearing spandex but the poor maid didn’t know that) and grabbed my sweater and raced out the door. In the end I made it, with Mom just ready to wait for me at the door!! However, I did receive a few giggles from the hotel staff the next morning. Oh well, I earned it.

Here is the inside of the dome. Excuse the poor photography, but the lighting everywhere isn’t ideal and I’m working with a simple IPhone. I wish I could truly capture the magnificence of the next pieces.


We moved on to the Uffizi Gallery. This used to be the banking offices of the Medici’s and man, were they LOADED. I was so over-stimulated in there. Everywhere you looked there was something intricate and/or famous to admire. And I mean everywhere, from the ceiling to the floor. I think I would have made a great Medici though, all that art at my fingertips?! Yes, please!!! But before we got in, we had to wait for our time in the outside plaza where they so graciously left a few sculptures for the “public” and a fake David too!! Obviously I just had to take a picture of the Steamy Alpaca in front of David. However the worst part is, I’d say 3/4 of these tourists thought it was the real one!!! Mom and I giggled like snobby art buffs. But hey, at least I own up to it!

Here’s me with a Medici Lion.

Finally in the Uffizi! There were a million busts lining the corridors so I just chose one and copied it's expression before the museum people could yell at me hehehe. Sorry random dead dude, you were just too funny not to post. I think I’ll make a bust of my head so that I can one day be in a gallery too. Maybe I should do my classic eye roll?

See what I mean about it being decorated from floor to ceiling?! So much art. I’ll just spend the week here, thank you very much.

Here’s what a typical room would have looked like in these offices. It’s just so beautiful!!! I couldn’t decide where to look. 

A Michelangelo...a real Michelangelo. Have I died and gone to heaven yet?

He was sponsored by the Medici's, and this is one of his few stand-alone paintings; he also designed and created the frame for it.  It's obviously behind bullet-proof, theft-proof, touch-proof, alarmed glass...

Another room in the gallery, I considered hiding so that at night I would have the whole museum to myself. Maybe I’ll just have to get super famous, shut the place down for myself and spend the whole day here with no other humans. Kind of like Lady Diana but perhaps more a la "The Crazy Mixed-up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler"... I’ll let you know how this plan goes.

The Roman God Mars about to bludgeon my head in.  I took a nice photo but then Mom made that comment and I just had to get a silly one.

This. Is. Real. The REAL Birth of Venus by Botticelli. Excuse me, I think I’ve just died and gone to heaven. Oh and by they way, it wasn’t a disappointment like the Mona Lisa. Mom might be a Da Vinci die-hard, but I know the good stuff. Botticelli and Caravaggio is where the true art is at.

We followed up the museum with some classic pasta. I’m going to live off pasta and gelato for the rest of my time here and no one can stop me! Hehe. Honestly, I should have been born Italian. I could eat this for breakfast, lunch and dinner and never get tired.  

We ended our very busy day with a leisurely stroll home along the river. Here’s the famous Ponte Vecchio.

However, Mom and I kind of favored the other bridge. Look at how much more artsy it is! Leave it to us to snub social dictation of what should be famous or not. 

Do you think the government will notice if I never return home? Can’t wait to update you on our next day.

Love you lots!

Carolyn